Born in Philadelphia in 1771, Frances Gratz was the second child and eldest daughter of Miriam Simon, daughter of Lancaster Indian trader and developer Joseph Simon, and Michael Gratz, the fun loving younger partner of the successful Gratz brothers firm in Philadelphia.

She was raised in Philadelphia and Lancaster among a brood of twelve active and independent children that included Rebecca Gratz and Benjamin Gratz.

In 1794, when she was 23 years old, Frances married Reuben Etting, whose younger brother Solomon had taken her cousin Rachel as his second wife two years before. The couple moved back and forth between Philadelphia and Baltimore as Reuben pursued various business opportunities. They would have five sons and three daughters. Only three of their sons married, producing thirteen grandchildren in all. Among their grandchildren were brothers Charles Edward Etting and Reuben Etting.